Top 5 Rules For Sugar Babies
I’ve done numbered lists before, and you probably know that I like them. They’re a good way to convey information in a straight-forward manner. And sugaring has a lot of important information to convey, so I think using these lists is a logical choice for me, in addition to being fun. That in mind, today I’m going to throw down five more sugar baby rules for you all to consider.
Some of this I may have said already in other lists, and if so I apologize, but I’m not about to go through my entire post history just to avoid repeating myself. If I do end up saying the same thing twice (or more), just take it as an indication of how important that particular rule is. Okay, let’s go!
1) Don’t Get Dependent
When I say it like that, it sounds like I’m talking about emotional dependence, and how you should avoid it. That’s a big one, too, and I’ll cover it in the next rule,but right now I’m talking about financial dependence. I list this first, because it’s one of the pitfalls in sugaring that got me,good and early. When I was having my first established sugar relationship, the money was intoxicating.
“Intoxicating” is the right word, because I had so much coming in (especially coming off of being flat broke, as I had been for years before) that I lost all reason. I got drunk, figuratively and literally, hitting the town with my friends in a way I hadn’t been able to for a long time and buying myself what few nice toys I wanted that my daddy wasn’t already getting for me. Needless to say, I barely understood what a savings account was for, and I thought “stocks” were medieval torture devices. The money I got, I spent, despite token promises I had made to myself that I wouldn’t be so wasteful.
Do you see where this is going? Things didn’t work out with my daddy (he and his wife suddenly decided they were going to “make things work”), and just like that, my gravy train came to a screeching halt. With virtually no money saved and no job, I was panicking within the week. Emergency support cash from my friends and parents (which felt just great to ask for) was the only reason I didn’t lose my apartment, and I ate so damn many ramen noodles I’m lucky I didn’t turn into one. It was a very hard lesson to learn, and I’m begging you to let me teach it to you instead of experience; that bitch is brutal.
Things got better for me when my camming work, which a friend of mine who was already into it had introduced me to, started bringing in some real money (it almost never does at first). I met another sugar daddy shortly after that,and life got good again, but I vowed never to get back into the same boat. I started setting aside some money every month for the ol’piggy bank, and I kept up my camming no matter how much I was getting from my daddy. This is probably the most important of all sugar baby rules: always have another income stream. The music could stop at anytime, and if it does, your ass needs a chair.
2) Hold Onto Yourself
Sugaring can be an emotionally intense experience, especially if you go into it seeing it as a business transaction with someone you aren’t “really” going to interact with on a personal level. That kind of thinking isn’t just wrong,it leaves you unprepared when you realize that you’re in a real relationship and that you’re developing real feelings. You have to be ready for the genuine affection you will probably have toward your daddy, and if you haven’t already had a privileged upbringing, you need to know how to deal with the new lifestyle to which you’ll most likely be exposed.
The best way to stay grounded is to make sure you don’t lose yourself in the sugar by staying true to who you were before you met your daddy. Like you would in a traditional relationship, keep a piece of you for you. Continue going out with your friends in your free time, have fun the same as always, and don’t stop pursuing your interests. Sugaring will change you (just as any other experience will), but it shouldn’t consume you.
3) Know When to Walk Away
Sugaring is a relationship, perhaps not quite like any other, but similar enough to others in the feelings it can (and usually does) engender, which can make it difficult to leave. Just as it’s important not to lose yourself in a sugar relationship, you have to know when it’s run its course and the time has come for you to pull yourself out altogether. The reasons this can happen are many, and not unlike those found in traditional relationships: you come to realize you and your partner (daddy)aren’t compatible, the relationship itself has become toxic in someway, or the love and excitement that were so powerful early on have simply faded with time.
The factors making it harder for you to decide to go even when you know you should are mostly emotional, such as lingering affection for your daddy or fear of giving up something familiar. But there’s no denying an additional pressure in sugaring, acting to keep you corralled within the fences of a dead or dying arrangement: loss of income. And this, I think, is why #1 on our list today is the single most important of all sugar baby rules.It’s bad enough having to worry about money when you’reconsidering ending a relationship; you absolutely DO NOT want to be in a situation in which you’re unhappy and know you need to move on, but are unable to do so because you simply can’t afford to lose your daddy’s money.
Not only are you trapped in this scenario, but it can easily become abusive, with a victimized sugar baby being dominated and controlled (rather than lovingly pampered) by her daddy’s financial power. Don’t let this happen to you. You MUST be able to get out, if and when you need to.
4) Beware of Scammers
It happens when you try to sell something on Craigslist. It happens when you post something online looking for a job. Hell, you literally can’t even sit back and check your e-mail without reading about the rich Nigerian Prince who’s desperate to give you half his fortune if you’ll only help him smuggle his money into the US by letting him deposit it all into your bank account. Anything you do on the Internet that involves money changing hands, attracts scammers, and unfortunately, looking for a sugar arrangement is no exception.
Avoiding most of these is a matter of common sense: a real potential daddy isn’t going to ask for your bank account information, social security number, or other personal details (except maybe your phone number, and be damn careful even with that), and there is no conceivable legitimate reason he would ever need to ask you for money. Sadly, it isn’t nearly so easy to sift out the “time stealers” who just want to meet and chat with you, without ever having the intention (or, almost certainly, the resources) to actually sugar with you.
You can usually tell when you go and see them: they aren’t dressed nicely, they say stupid shit to amuse or arouse themselves because they know this isn’t going anywhere, etc. But by then, it’s too late, since you’ve already cleared your evening for them and gone to the trouble of prettying yourself up. It’s frustrating, but largely unavoidable. Just protect your money (which is very doable), and be on your guard.
5) Never Have Sex on the First Date
A lot of girls come into sugaring thinking that they’re offering to be paid for sex, and that therefore, their first meeting with a potential daddy should naturally end with the two of them in bed and a handsome wad of cash in the baby’s pocket. This is wrong on so many levels, it hurts.First of all, if that’s the kind of “arrangement” you’re interested in, go set yourself up as a paid escort, which is a completely different profession.
Secondly, if you approach sugaring this way, you’re going to get taken advantage of. Some guys WANT sugaring to work this way, because then they can lure a girl in with big talk and promises of a huge allowance, followed by a good time in the sack, Uber fare for the girl’s ride home or a small payoff (if she’s lucky), and absolutely no contact beyond that in the future.A respectable daddy won’t even expect sex the first time he sees you (beware of any man who does), if ever. The initial meeting is forgetting to know each other, becoming comfortable in one another’s presence, and discussing a general outline of the arrangement you’re both looking for. Leave it at that.
Let me close with a warning that sugaring is not to be taken lightly. You have to be serious about what you’re doing, and never forget to protect yourself, because there ARE people who will try to prey on you emotionally,financially, sexually, and in various other ways.
A good way to“practice” for sugaring in person is to try an online-only arrangement first, as a way of getting your feet wet; this really helps to prepare you for a lot of what you’ll face when you do it in the real world. Like I’ve said before, all you really need to do is perform on a cam site (Chaturbate works best for this), and look for whales. Some of them will be interested in being online sugar daddies. I really recommend giving it a shot.
So, start online, be safe, and remember these sugar baby rules, and you’ll be just fine.